Here are our answers to some frequently asked questions.

Q: What is this site about anyway?

A: The site is dedicated to helping people live the Golden Rule. Simply declare your intent to begin living by the Golden Rule. See the essay on our home page for more information. There is no cost, nothing to buy, and you don't even have to join a group or sign up for any newsletter. This is simple, but it is not easy!

Q: Why are you doing this?

A: What could be more important?

Q: How are you interpreting the Golden Rule? Doesn’t reciprocity go both ways? Should I do unto others before they do unto me? Is this advocating revenge and retaliation? Should I continue cycles of abuse?

A: The Golden Rule is kindness and compassion. Consider the intent and convergence of the concepts expressed by all of the cultures and religions that advocate the Golden Rule. Base your actions on empathy, respect and dignity, charity, contribution, caring, compassion, community, forgiveness, and non-violence. Do no harm, take a global perspective, and act constructively. Violence, cruelty, humiliation, personal attacks, trespass, abuse, oppression, vengeance, and revenge are strictly off-limits and out-of-bounds. Play, which can appear to be rough at times, is an important part of socialization and is certainly permitted, but be certain that everyone involved is enjoying this play. Treat others as peers—your equal—ensure the relationship is symmetrical. Be authentic in your relationship, candid in your conversations, and congruent in your actions. Choose humility over arrogance, stillness over aggression and destruction, cooperation over competition, contribution over consumption, inclusion over exclusion, needs over wants, generosity over greed, peer over power, candor over deceit, stature over status, dignity over disrespect, trust over manipulation, and authentic over bogus.

The recently adopted Charter for Compassion amplifies these ideas. (You may wish to download this pdf version of the charter)

Q: Are you saying I have to give in and indulge other people’s every whim? Will I just become a “yes man”, a patsy, a wimp, and a chump? Do I always have to capitulate and go along with whatever it is the other person wants? Is this just “going along to get along?”

A: No, you can be willful as you are empathetic, humble, kind, respectful, and compassionate. Act responsibly yourself, and do not condone or indulge another's lack of responsibility, disrespect, or cruel behavior. If you are uncertain about how to act, consult this list of widely held values for guidance. When you encounter conflict, work to understand the conflicting goals, work to transcend the conflict, and work together toward a constructive resolution. When the other person is being childish, cruel, abusive, irresponsible, lazy, cowardly, hypocritical, harmful, dishonest, unfair, selfish, greedy, or inconsiderate, you can give them candid, firm, and fair feedback. Say what you mean without being mean, preaching, or proselytizing. Preserve and strengthen the relationship as you are being clear about your own viewpoint, choices, goals, values, and the basis for your beliefs and actions. Work to build trust and mutual respect. Follow these guidelines for working together.

Q: At work I am a tyrant, I have to be, its a dog eat dog world out there. But I contribute generously to charities and attend religious services regularly, is that enough?

A: No - the pledge is to always live by the Golden Rule. It's not a transaction where good deeds make up for bad deeds; living the Golden Rule requires constantly demonstrating your compassion.